September ended well

Dear diary,

I learnt a valuable lesson on Wednesday.

That friendships are a choice.

I learnt that no matter what crap life gives you, life still has to go on and somehow amidst all the nonsense and confusion... God is still in control. I'm really thankful that I prayed about stuff and found peace to do/say the things I did on Wednesday.

I learnt that if I really care, I just need to say that I care. Being a bystander and trying to act tough really doesn't work for me. I wasn't meant to "act tough" anyway. All I needed was just to be honest and sincere.

Even though things didn't turn out like a happy ending. In fact, it doesn't look like anything at the moment... I still feel great. I still think that I can sleep at night with the confidence that I fought for friendship. That despite what I was feeling for the beginning of the week, I decided to rage against those emotions and choose based on fact and not feeling. I decided for faith and not failure.

I'm in the last leg of the year - October and November. December is my well earned year-end holiday. I'm already feeling excited with my own personal plans - drive out and spend time alone with myself and God, help out in a camp, spend one last time with those graduating and going to college.

September ended well, and i intend to see that October and the rest of the days be filled with joy, hope, peace and faith. That's something that I will definitely need God to be in charge of : )

For what it's worth, i really treasured the past things that have happened from January until September. There's no doubt about it that God was and still is in charge of my life.

For what it's worth, though you might not be reading this... I just want to say...

That i'm glad you're a friend. Not for one second i doubted that. and thank God, not for one second you gave up on me. Thank you.

i will bring praise

i will bring praise

no weapon formed against me shall remain